When will my reflection show who I am inside?

Day #9 Blog Prompt: “Reflection” video from Mulan

It is all too common for us to focus on the needs and expectations of others.  We worry about being there for our spouses, children, parents, siblings, friends, co-workers — hey practically the whole world!  We get wrapped up in what we think we should do or be for others.  We become a shell of our true selves, just a reflection of who others think we are.

NEWSFLASH!

You have an INCURABLE, neurological disease for which there has only been ONE new treatment in over 50 years. There is currently no known cause and no condition-specific preventive.  This incurable disease can knock you flat on your back for days. It can leave you totally disabled. It constantly looms as a threat to your career and relationships.  It can even destroy your will to live.  It requires your attention and vigilance. When you look in the mirror, migraine casts a shadow over your reflection.

Whether you get one attack a year or never get relief, it is still a permanent part of what you face every daily.  Acting like it doesn’t exist for the sake of others is playing with fire. I’ve lived with migraine for almost 40 years.  Trust me — denial has a way of bringing out the worst of this disease when you least expect it.

When will your reflection show who you are inside?

It starts when you accept that your self-image is distorted. Stop trying to separate yourself from migraine.  I can already hear that mantra, “You are not your disease.”  Baloney. When migraine has been a part of your existence for a lifetime, it is foolhardy to separate yourself from the disease.  It’s like trying to say that blindness doesn’t impact the identity of someone who’s been blind from birth.  You can waste a lifetime waiting, hoping, and dreaming for the day when migraines “go away” and you can finally get on with living.

Don’t waste your life waiting for something that might not ever happen.  Sit down in front of that mirror and take a long hard look.  See the migraine within, then tell yourself the truth. Repeat after me.

“I am the face of migraine disease.”

Say it over and over until it becomes second nature…until you believe it like you believe the sky is blue.  Surrender yourself to a life dotted with migraine attacks.  Welcome their presence. Embrace it as just another feature of who you are. Then your reflection really will show who you are inside.

Congratulations! You are no longer delusional. Welcome to sanity and reason. Now you can begin the process of discovering who you are.  You now have the opportunity to meet everyone for the first time as the “migraine-you”. Let them get to know the real you.  Some may not be able to relinquish their inaccurate view of you. They might need to step out of your life. Let them go with love. There will be so many new friends to take their place. You will recognize these new friends right away by the migraine reflection in their eyes.

The 2014 Migraine and Headache Awareness Month, is dedicated to Dreaming of a World without Migraine and Headache Disorders. The 2014 Migraine and Headache Awareness Month Blog Challenge is a project of American Headache & Migraine Association.