You are more than you think you are
This weekend I got my inspiration from something my husband said. I was driving. He was tired and grouchy, complaining that I was “swerving too much” on the road. I kept insisting, “I’m not swerving.” To which he would grumble,”You ARE, more than you think you are.”
That phrase just kept bouncing around in my head until it finally took a completely different form. My dear, sweet, stressed out hubby had just given me a beautiful nugget of truth I had to share with you. I just had to change the wording emphasis on that phrase.
You are MORE than you think you are.
I got to thinking about my body image. In my head, I am still 20 years old wearing a size 4. When I shop for clothes, my first impulse is still to reach for those XS shirts and expect them to fit. It’s not that I hated my body. I just didn’t own it. It’s pretty hard to find the motivation to change something that isn’t really yours.
This photo was taken on Christmas Even 2011. I hated this photo because it “didn’t look like me”. Now I like it. I was happy and pain-free. I was enjoying my family that day for the first holiday in a very long time. That is worth celebrating.
So for 48 hours I promised to realy look at the body I actually have. I agreed to find positives about my shape and size, to embrace the history, the journey that made me…not some long-past fantasy girl…just me.
I realized something.
Those scars, that cellulite and excess body fat — they all tell my story. Each stretch mark, those “thunder thighs”, “bubble butt”, and “muffin top” has a story to tell. It is the story of my fight with Migraines and Cluster Headaches. It’s that single-minded focus on fighting the Beasts that shaped me.
I am fat.
I am a fighter.
I am winning.
I am beautiful.
Now it’s your turn. Stand in front of your mirror naked and observe the way your body tells the story of your life. Learn from it. Embrace it.
You are MORE than you think you are.
This year I am focusing my efforts on building awareness for my “other” headache disorder, Cluster Headaches. To read my posts for the Blogging Challenge, click on the Cluster Headache image at the top of the home page.
